I'm a Mormon

So, I know this is a really iffy topic for some people, but I felt like it was something that I should write about. This is a very religion-based post, and quite personal, just as a heads up to anyone reading.

I LOVE life because...I'm a Mormon.

Now I know that everyone has their own opinion about religion. Many people think that this church is true, or this one. Other's don't believe in religion at all. Whether someone believes in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints or not, it doesn't really matter that much to me. I think that everyone has a right to their own opinion and their own views. All I ask is that if you are reading this, and have no intention but to write a rude comment below, please stop reading now and leave this page. If not, feel free to read away and try and enjoy what I have to say.

Now I have been LDS my entire life, and have become the person I am today because of it. To many, I was known as "The Bishop's son", or the over-used "Peter Priesthood". Those, in title, made me feel like I had to be perfect in everything I did spiritually. I always did what I was supposed to, and tried my hardest to stay out of trouble. Later, I realized that I didn't really have a testimony of the church. I was just riding on the coat tails of others. I was just feeding off of the testimonies of others, and sort of made it my own. It wasn't until I was about 18 that I realized I needed to gain a testimony for myself. I was preparing for a mission as all 18 year old, male Mormons do. As I prepared, and took a Missionary Prep class at the Institute, I finally began to gain a testimony that was my own. 

I served my mission in the Washington Tacoma Mission. I thought this was really interesting when I got the call because I had family that was living within my mission. I was so excited to be serving a mission, especially because I was told many times that I would not be able to serve because of my health. I served for about three months until I returned because of health problems. If you know me, I have a whole caboodle of health problems. This brought me down, down to a level of depression that was terrible for me physically, mentally, and spiritually. I didn't know what to do, and I thought that I was a terrible person for coming home from my mission early. Don't get me wrong, there are wonderful people in the church, but some people just made me feel even worse about myself while talking to them. 

I will admit that I have struggled with the church many times in the past, and sometimes still do. Quite recently I thought about leaving the church for good, but something stopped me. I can't really explain what happened, but I had a sort of epiphany. My life wasn't going the way that I wanted it to, and I realized I needed to change something. I realized that I was ready to turn my back on all that I knew, and a lot of the people that I loved. It was one of the hardest times in my life...I can't even describe the pain that I was feeling. I resorted to hurting myself, and sometimes suicide attempts, but I know that I was protected for a reason. I knew that I wasn't finished here. I had a purpose that I needed to fulfill.

I was, at first, a little resistant to listen to General Conference that happened just a couple weeks ago. I did listen though, and I listened well. It was such an amazing experience for me to listen to Conference and hear the testimonies of the leaders of the church. It reminded me of the love I have for the church. The love that I have for God and for His son, Jesus Christ. It made me want to turn my life around, and try and be the best person I could be.

The beautiful Logan Temple

Today we had Stake Conference which gave me an extra spiritual boost. It made me realize that I love the gospel and want other people to know of it too. After that I walked around the Logan Temple with my roommate Jeremy, and just had a nice Sunday afternoon.

Now I'm not saying that I am perfect, because I am nowhere near that. I am just trying my best to follow the things that I believe are true. If anyone reading this has interest in the LDS Church, I encourage you to seek someone out who can help you understand more about it. I know this isn't a funny post or anything that I usually write, but I just felt the need to write this. Have a beautimus day, week, and life!

I LOVE life because....I'm a Mormon.

Relationships

I know when you see this title you'll think, "Eww, relationships? Really Steven?", but I am completely serious about this topic. I don't mean just relationships that you have that you hope to move towards marriage or something, I just mean relationships in general. Relationships with family, friends, and even your dog :)

I LOVE life because...Relationships can be made.

Lately I have realized that relationships are an important thing in this world to make. I have been thinking about this a lot lately because we have been talking about them in my psychology class. One thing I love about psychology is that it makes you think, a lot, about thinking and pretty much every aspect of your life. Something I learned recently was when we start to make the links in our brains that we have a relationship with someone. In the first six months of life we don't really know much of anything. We know that we eat, sleep, and put boom-boom in our pants. We just have survival instincts, because every animal is inbred with these instincts. It is not til the second half of the first year of life that we begin to realize some connections. At this time we finally realize a thing called Attachment. In psychological vernacular, attachment is defined as: the strong affectionate tie we have with special people in our lives that leads us to feel pleasure when we interact with and them and to be comforted by their nearness in times of stress.

How amazing is it that we are biologically programmed to attach to someone on an emotional level? There's a whole study on this with monkeys and it's super interesting, but I'm not going to go into that because it would take a really long time...anyway. The bottom line is that we all want relationships and closeness to somebody, unless you are Sheldon from Big Bang, then you are excused. 

The cutest picture of my parents

The first relationship we develop is that with our family. Specifically our mother. If you know me, you'll know that I love my mother with all my heart. She is the best person I know and knows me better than I know myself. I can't even describe how much I love this woman. She has been there for me through every single thing in my life. The good, the bad, everything. She is the most amazing person I know, and I would not be here today without her (biologically and emotionally speaking). The most common relationship that comes next is with the father. My father is one of the strongest people I know. My whole life he has been sick, but he has always seemed so strong to me. I guess I follow in his footsteps in the being sick part, but I hope to be as strong as he is someday. I may not always agree with what he says, and he probably doesn't always agree with me, but I love him so much.

Me and my beautiful sisters

Next comes our relationship with our siblings. I have four beautiful older sisters. Some people ask me if I like being the only boy and the youngest, and all I have to say is that yes, I loved it. Of course I always wanted a brother, but having four older sisters has prepared me for a lot of things that others aren't prepared for. My sister Corinne is the oldest. She is very headstrong and won't take crap from anyone, not even her husband haha. She's not afraid to tell me when I'm being stupid, which I need sometimes. Megan is next and she has a wonderful spirit about her. I can't really explain it, but she makes me want to be a better person. Hence, she was part of the reason I started this blog. Shalynn comes next. She is such a wonderful sister and cares so much about my well being. She has been through a lot herself, but she still makes sure that I'm okay. Last but not least is my sister Janae. Janae is the smartest person I know. She is beautiful and makes me remember to get out there and try new things. She inspires me to get out of my bubble. ALL of my sisters are incredibly beautiful and loving. I love them so much and couldn't ask for better sisters.

So, I've talked a lot about familial relationships, but there are relationships that can be just as influential as family. That is the relationships we make with the people that we call our friends. I love my friends and I have made many throughout my lifetime. There are those that you know you will have fun with when you see them, and those that you can always laugh with. Those are all great. One of the important ones though, are the friends you can be yourself around. The friends that love you even though they know all of your faults. ALL of your faults. These are the friends that you know you'll have for life. I can think of quite a few that I will always have. Whether they be very old friends, or not so old friends, they are there to stay and I love them. 

In life we all make soooo many relationships. We'll have teachers, cousins, aunts, uncles, everybody. There is one relationship that we all know of, and that is a relationship of love and commitment. This is an interesting topic for many. I am definitely not going to say whether this relationship has to be between a man and a woman or not, it is just a relationship everyone knows about. Each and every person, even animals, want to find a relationship with another person and spend part, if not all of their life with that individual. I honestly can't say that I have a lot of experience in this area, but I can't definitely say that I have found someone that I think I could be with for the rest of my life. I don't know if they know that or not, and they may not for a while, but someday I will see what happens there.


I'm sorry if  you came into this post hoping for something short and funny, or something that maybe makes a little more sense. I really just needed to get things off my chest and write them here for others to see. I know it was super long, but I think it was time well spent. I encourage anyone to really look at the relationships that they have made, and cherish each and every one. That is all for now, peace out world.

I LOVE life because...Relationships can be made.